• Matthew Brincat

Barcelona Journal Entries

It carried no name, because it was never born. It found Life within Death.

Having my newly published book in hand, reading the words on the yellowish paper, I realized the power of what yields such "thoughts". Never it was, that I wrote those words, for I was only the pen surfing the pages as waves, in the hand of that which cannot be seen.

I have never dreamt of this man that I now am, for he is the child of once. What happened in between is the Ode of Loss. The burning to ashes, of the conditioned mind. It still comes to visit, but the warmth within this Love, gives the minds seduction to the flames.

The Love between us...

I am on my way to Barcelona, with two old friends that surprised me with a flight, and a Bonobo concert ticket. Not to dismiss the new friends that were present throughout this trip, people to laugh, walk, and talk with. With all this, my cup was already overflowing with joy, and bottomless gratitude.

I find myself on plane, sitting next to a stranger that has greeted me with the grief within her present life. Left only to wonder about the unfolding of the Life that is sustaining me. It was a long and winding path, with countless falls into darkness. Yet the last fall is what brought me to this peakless view. Higher and higher it's going. Clouds have been made to be the beds upon which I rest at night. Stars are the shine with which my body keeps its breath. The Moon is the one that offered to shelter my emotions, while the Sun has taken my eyes as its home.

The more I surrender my will to the rhythm of Life, the more infinite it becomes. The boundaries that confine me to the personal, are lessening. In the world that I once hated, I am finding glory in the love for others.

A place from where one can see atop oneself, made out of pebbles, ruins, tears of laughter, and love for each other. Walking among the game of flowers and shadows. A burning embrace of green leaves, bound to a dance of trees. Winding breeze, of harmonious peace. The rocks in chorus, reciting The Ode of Unfold. Everything silenced my lips within its marriage of boundless architecture. In here, the five of us, came together.

She is the purest of reflections, holding my body in one hand, as the skin of her breasts reminds me of the clouds. Her dance upon me, is led by moans of the Moon and his Night. She swims through the bedsheets, knowing how to take over me with fervent and boundless freedom. Her wisdom brings to me the breath of the Sun, when I dwell in the hiding depths, gently taking me back up to kiss the splashing of waves, in dance of push and pull.

She is the daughter of water.

The softened space is offering a clearer vision, a sight of what is now to me foreign, something which purpose has been duly expired. It took home within my nature, holding in its cup of fear, a consuming anger. It seductively takes over with arrogance, and a spiteful taste. It is now time for me to be free from its fetish grasp, and suffocating whip. To let it fade, in its disappearance within vulnerability, and the nakedness of Love.

Silence holds me within your womb.

#friends #adventure #love #discovery #sexuality #poetry #philosophy #barcelona #journal

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